What's Your Word Worth?

In olden times, when such a thing was still possible, I made plans with a good friend of mine to meet up for drinks and dinner.

It had been a long time since we’d seen each other and I was really excited to catch up.

It wasn’t a special event, per se— not a birthday or anything along those lines.

Just a Saturday afternoon and some quality time together.

The day came and I did all my "to-dos” early in the day so I would be free and clear and unencumbered when we met up.

About two hours before we were scheduled to meet, my phone dinged with a text.

I think you know what happened next.

I honestly don’t remember what had come up for her.

I’m sure it was legit and necessary and that her cancellation couldn’t be avoided.

She’s a good friend who wouldn’t have simply blown off our dinner.

The thing is when we made plans next, I didn’t anticipate it with the same level of excitement and commitment.

I caught myself referring to our plans in terms like, “Well, if dinner on Saturday happens, I’ll…”

If…

If it happens.

You see, even when promises and commitments are broken for legitimate, unavoidable reasons, they still result in diluted trust.

There’s an old saying:

“Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.”

This is definitely true when it comes to promises and commitments.

But here’s the thing: this isn’t only true when other people break a promise to us.

Trust gets diluted when we break promises to ourselves as well.

When we break a commitment to ourselves, we begin to internalize the belief that we don’t really mean it.

We don’t really mean that we’ll get up on time tomorrow.

We don’t really mean that we’ll start eating more vegetables.

We don’t really mean that we’ll move our bodies in some way every single day.

Over time, we cultivate a habit out of not following through on our word.

Saying one thing and doing another is a practice.

How we treat others is a direct reflection of how we treat ourselves and how we expect others to treat us.

We begin, as always, with awareness: what is your word worth?

Do you trust yourself to do what you say you’ll do?

If not, simply start where you are.

Begin practicing.

Begin making a small commitment to yourself, something that might not even matter very much in itself, but is an opportunity for you to practice following through.

Set your alarm for five minutes earlier than you have to get up and commit to not hitting snooze.

Promise yourself that you’ll do one extra loop around the block when you walk your dog tonight.

Keep your word when you decide not to speak harshly to yourself today.

Over time, this will be the habit you cultivate instead.

With each promise you make to yourself and keep, the trust you have in yourself will grow.

The more you will see yourself as someone who follows through, who only commits to things you intend to show up for.

This is what progress looks like.

This is what integrity looks like.

You can do it.

You can build the skill of keeping your word.

It’s cultivated in your small day-to-day doings.

Honor your word.

Show up for yourself.

You’re worth it.